When I am naked I can see all the bruises, cold showers ignite the pain and I cannot stand here much longer. I walk around an empty house where the darkness of the day blurs my vision.
I lay down clawing the window outside my house; reaching for some sort of escape. Watching cars pass, children screaming.
This house is crumbling. The creaks and rips within my homestead alarm me. An intruder at the top of the staircase.
For a moment I am terriffied, but then my eyes narrow and a feeling of apathy races over me.
The Silver, shimmering figure descends the stairs, again taking no particular shape.
I turn around again to face the window cold and completive.
I want to die, but how shall I do it. A million ideas race past me.
Just as my mind fixes itself upon one particular plan to end it all, i hear a woman's voice. Untraceable but strangely calming and mother-like.
"Which way are you going?"
A chill tears down my spine and my stone cold demeanor clings to the prospect of life once again; for no particular reason.
The lights turn on, and my world has its focus again.
When I am ready to leave this place and follow my dreams, I will know. And I will be mildly prepared.
And no my life is far from expendable, I plan on living long past reaching my dreams.
To feel like I belonged with these people who stand next to me.
But now that I am here, I realized something.
I suck at this whole drumming thing, I mean the only time I remember feeling really confident about my skill was during ALT, and even then I was playing cymbals.
When every single one of my senoirs don't practice, it makes me feel weak.
This week, they practically sight read all their parts and could not even play the show.
I just want to punch them in the face and say, "Why the fuck are you even here. It's a proven system at my school. Don't like drumline, hate the directors? Quit."
Since last year began, almost 6 people have dropped perc because of it.
And now, I wonder.....who's going to be left standing when I graduate.
Will we even have a drumline?
Why can't our directions open their eyes and make some SERIOUS changes around here.
When will I feel welcome in this spot...that was named for me.
My instructor has so much faith in me, and I believe that...above all else will be my downfall.
The way you would look through just to breahte.
Foundations of Night and Day seem to crumble away at the very thought of you and me.
It's just several things that bother me lately.
The wind in my hair screams "All you wanted to say to me."
My arms are like little wings of a jet.
Soaring through the air and my mind just can't seem to forget.
All the times, she held me. Fingers to lips. My throat can't equip.
This soooonnnngg. This song.
And as summer builds the trees, my world's falling like the leaves as they die away.
When will she say, gooodbye? GoooddbyeeeEEEE!
I need to get used to you.
Say goodbye.
and I'll say it too.
When I feel uncomfortable in a situation or someone I like is near. I will start hand-drumming like no ones buisness till this disappear.
Sometimes they notice me and I'll start doing more complicated rythms and promptly screw up.
The usually I flash a smile and cheese it outta there.
I do hate it when people make sitatuions akward so I might do something dramatic or stupid to get someone to laugh.
Or I'll just kick them, whatever mood I'm in : ).
- Mood:
restless - Music:AVALON!
I will wakeup at 5 a.m so I can get down to the venue with you.
I will sit there in the baking sun for 12 hours, getting a key-shaped sunburn on my cleavage.
I will endure, stupid bitches, liers, and total lack of shade so you can have your spot in line.
I will hang out with you for all this time, in the heat, doing h/w, and being constantly pestered by my most annoying, good-intentioned friend.
I will drink hot soda, hot water, year old chips and cookies, waiting for actual nourishment.
I will fight for your right to be 2nd in line, and no one will take it away from us.
I am right behind when 9 fat hookers, show up 20 minutes before doors open and you begin to verbally, almost physically assault them, and I am fully prepared to get kicked out of this venue for you.
When doors finally open, I will knock said hookers out of our way as we all bum rush the stage.
Even when we get there, I will try to help you take off the plastic wristband of death that is slowly eating your wrist, and causing you to bleed.
When your left hand is purple, and bleeding I will give you the best advice to get out and get help.
I will drop my spot in front-center of a major venue just to make sure you are ok.
And somehow, I will find us a way to get right back to our spot in line because I am a straight-up g, homie.
I will not mind if you scream of all the lyrics to every song trying to match hayley's pitch (which is quite impossible for some songs), and endure every flat note and every post-pubescent voice crack.
I will endure the way you practically raped us against the barricade while you were rocking it out to your favorite band.
After such a glorious show, I will help you buy the tour jacket, even if I am paying for a third of it.
And after everything is said and done I will still call you my bestfriend, and tell you that I love you always.
Words cannot express how much this girl means to me.
For a day that should've ended in multiple disasters, you made understand the good in people.
You have my heart, and completely ownership over Mr. Left.
I love you,
FtD
- Mood:
nostalgic
If you could make your own reality show, what would it be about and who would be on it?
Submitted By ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8){kind=small}
lauralieisfly
It would follow a different roadie every month, showing what they have to put up with and basically how they survived.
Fans of the show may vote to get their favorite band's roadies on tv, but often times the most unexpected titles will appear.
Of course it will not just be about their jobs, but it will circumference their personal lives, familes and the struggle to be financial stable in one of the most unappreciated jobs out there.
- Mood: bored
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